Down the Rabbit Hole
by Livia Ethelind
Summary: During the first year Dumbledore decides to have an easter egg hunt for the younger students - things do not go as planned for neither Harry nor Snape. No slash. WARNINGS: Drug use, profanity


**AN: I own and make nothing. This is just a bit of sillyness.**

* * *

Harry stared at the piece of parchment attached to the board in the Gryffindor common-room. Professor McGonagall's signature at the bottom looked just as it usually did so it had to be real, didn't it?

"You've got to be kidding me!" mumbled Ron to his left. "What are we, babies?"

"Well..." huffed Hermione as she struggled to move through the crowd forming around the board and reach the boys. "It used to be tradition at Hogwarts! Only it was canceled decades ago due to a disappearance."

"Disappearance?" Harry gaped at her just before she tumbled into him.

"How can it be that dangerous?" shrugged Ron as he and the rest of the trio escaped from the body of students. They moved to an empty part of the room. Most of the other students were discussing in front of the board and the elder students remained in their seats, chatting merrily.

"Well, if you'd actually bothered to read _Hogwarts: A history_ , you'd know they not only did it before but it used to be in the forbidden forest," lectured Hermione.

"But that's dangerous! Don't you remember..." Harry began.

"Shh!" hushed both of his friends.

"Honestly, Harry, after seeing you-know-what on floor you-know-which, are you really surprised? They're barking mad I tell you! Absolutely bonkers!" Ron continued as he pulled a bag of every-flavor-beans out of his cloak.

"I'm sure it will be very safe and supervised," argued Hermione. "I don't believe our teachers would allow us to do this if it was dangerous!"

"It's an _easter egg hunt_ , Hermione!" complained Ron. "We're not bloody five! It's stupid!"

"Also what about..." mumbled Harry so no one else could hear.

"Yeah, did you forget about old beak face?" Ron cut him off.

"Shh! Ron, that's no way to speak about a teacher!" Hermione admonished.

"He tried to kill me!" Harry hissed a little too loud, resulting in Ron gently nudging him.

"I know," said Hermione with a look of sorrow in her eyes. "But professor Snape is a teacher so you still should not call him that. Honestly if I hadn't seen it myself I would have never believed it."

"I would have," muttered Ron. "But you were brilliant! I'd have never thought of..."

"Shh!" Hermione hushed him again, although a pale pink blush spread across her cheeks.

"It could be fun," admitted Harry. He'd never actually gone to an easter egg hunt before and even though he agreed with Ron that it was kind of childish, he really wanted to try. Either way it was an afternoon off from classes.

"It's mandatory," Hermione reminded him. "For all 1st, 2nd and 3rd years. So, Ron unless you want to eat nausea nougat and land yourself in the hospital wing for the day – you're going!"

"There is a prize," Harry reminded Ron.

"I bet you Malfoy is going to set his goons on anyone who finds an egg," huffed Ron.

"Well, do you want to let him?" Harry smirked as he playfully shoved Ron.

"Boys! Why do they always have to make it a fight?" said Hermione, rolling her eyes.

* * *

The day had finally arrived and Ron had spent the last two days consulting the twins upon various methods to get the better of Malfoy during the contest. This had most likely been prompted by Zabini asking Malfoy about whether he'd like to team up and Malfoy giving a very long and very loud speech in the charms classroom about how easter eggs were for babies but he was going to win first place anyway. The first through third years gathered in the entrance hall just after lunch around a rather stern looking professor McGonagall.

"Good afternoon, students!" she began, her voice soaring above the crowd and silencing everyone – including Malfoy who was making noises and rude gestures at Neville. "As you know the Headmaster thought it would be a _good idea_ to reinstate the easter egg hunt."

Harry couldn't help but noticing that McGonagall didn't sound like she agreed with that at all.

"Before we begin I will just repeat the rules, although I am certain you have all read them thoroughly and will obey them to the letter. There will be absolutely no use of magic during the contest!" she proclaimed, giving the twins a stern look. "Furthermore there will be no use of violence! No shoving, no punching, nothing! You will not stray from the designated area! The forbidden forest is still out of bounds! The eggs will be hidden on school grounds only but not inside any buildings nor will they be in any of the gardens so if you will please refrain from ruining those we would appreciate it. You will each be given a basket and once an egg has been placed inside it, it has been claimed. Stealing eggs from other students is not permitted. There are four prizes to be won. Three will be given to the students with the most eggs – the student in first place winning the grand prize. There will also be a prize for the house that collectively gathers the most eggs and therefore team-play is also important."

"Ugh," Ron muttered next to Harry. "Can't we just get on with it?"

"Ron! Be quiet!" Hermione hissed.

"Miss Granger, if you could be silent until I've finished, thank you," McGonagall said, much to Hermione's dismay. "The other House Heads and I will be patrolling the grounds and any rule breaking may result in your removal from the contest."

" _Well, just my luck!_ " thought Harry to himself as he grimaced. He exchanged glances with Ron and the redheaded boy moved a bit closer to him as if to signal that he wouldn't leave his side if Snape was lurking about out there. Harry knew Ron was convinced Snape would jump at him and gut him the moment he got the chance but actually Harry was more worried about how Snape was bound to see to it his Slytherins won. Yes, he was pretty scared of the man but he also had a feeling that charging at him with a knife wasn't a very Snapish thing to do. Then again the man tried to murder him in front of the whole school. Of course he hadn't tried anything since – unless he had anything to do with that creature in the forest and Harry wasn't sure about that. That thing had been after Malfoy too, right? Also Hermione kept saying that there was no reason to be afraid since they would all be able to go together.

"Professor?" said Seamus as he raised his hand.

"Yes, Mr Finnegan?"

"What are the prizes going to be?"

"Professor Dumbledore has decided that the three main prizes are to be surprises but I can reveal that the winning house will receive an award of 100 extra points," McGonagall concluded as she turned to the doors. Clearly she was not in the mood for anymore questions.

"When I open the doors, the game will begin. Please exit the school in an orderly fashion!"

Of course that was easier said than done! As soon as the doors opened the students ran for it. McGonagall elegantly swept aside although had she moved the least bit slower she would have been trampled by Goyle. Harry didn't really have time to do much but grab Hermione's hand and pull her along with them as the boys ran outside. It seemed nobody really cared anymore that the whole thing was a bit childish. Now they thought of it as a competition above all else and it didn't matter that what you were doing was searching for eggs as long as you were the best one at it.

Outside was a large pyramid of tiny baskets with ribbons in various pastel colors and it wasn't long before the structure tumbled as children pulled baskets out of the foundation. Harry was pushed aside by a pack of Ravenclaw girls as he reached for one but was pulled to safety by Ron, who had already gotten his. Hermione proved she had more dexterity than Harry had previously believed by going into the chaos and emerging with two baskets – one with pink ribbons, the other with yellow. Harry gratefully took the yellow one and the trio began looking around to see which direction they should go. Children were already spreading out and eagerly searching the grounds. Harry noticed that the grass was longer than usual – probably on purpose.

"There's one!" Hermione cried as she excitedly held up a pale orange egg that she had found in the grass next to her shoe. Harry looked closely at it. It didn't look like it was made of chocolate but honestly nothing around here appeared to be exactly what it seemed.

"Honestly, 'Mione! Do you have to make us look bad at this too?" Ron teased her before he frantically began searching the grass. Just then Harry's left foot hit something and he bend down to discover a blue and rose egg. When you looked really closely the colors seemed to move slightly as if they were alive. He didn't get to examine the egg for long though because in the next moment he felt someone shoving him hard in the back. Harry landed on the ground. He didn't fail to hear the sound of the egg cracking under his weight.

"Ooops! Watch where you're going Potter!" sneered Malfoy before he walked away, laughing with his friends.

"Bloody hell!" muttered Ron as Hermione helped Harry to his feet.

"How did that git sneak up on us?" groaned Harry as he let the pieces of what was indeed a chocolate egg fall to the ground.

"No bloody way he's getting away with this!" continued Ron.

"Ron! Don't start a fight! This is supposed to be fun!" said Hermione. "Besides you'll only get kicked out!"

"Who cares if the bat sees me? In fact I wouldn't mind seeing his face as I punch his little rat in the nose!" grumbled Ron with a confidence which Harry knew for a fact he wouldn't possess if Snape was actually standing in front of him.

"We'll get him back some other time," Harry said, although he wanted to give Malfoy a piece of his mind as well.

The trio continued searching the grounds for eggs. After 20 more minutes it wasn't a surprise to anyone that Hermione had 12, Ron had 2 and Harry had 7. He had expected to find the tiny eggs faster being a seeker and all but his mind was distracted.

"There's no eggs anywhere!" Ron complained.

"Well, we're walking together. If we spread out we should find more," explained Hermione.

The next moment Hermione's scream caused both boys to snap their heads up. Hermione was lying on the ground. Her basket lay a few meters away from her. The eggs lay around her – only half of them still intact. The bits of the egg that had been throw to the back of her head was still caught in her bushy hair. Behind them a familiar group of Slytherins were snickering.

"Miss Granger, are you well? Be careful where you step, girl!" called professor Sprout who had just appeared from behind a wall.

"Ugh! Yes, professor!" replied Hermione as she got up.

"This is it!" muttered Ron. "THIS IS IT! I'll show those slimy bastards!"

"Ron!" hissed Harry. "Professor Sprout is still here!"

"I'm going to go talk to my brothers and see if they came up with something."

With that Ron stalked off, leaving Harry and Hermione behind.

"Hey, Granger!" cried Malfoy as soon as Sprout was out of hearing range. "Nice panties, like daisies?" The rest of the group behind him laughed.

Hermione blushed scarlet when she realized her skirt had gone slightly up when she fell over.

"Shut your mouth, Malfoy!" cried Harry.

"Ooo, are you going to make me, Potter?" smirked the Slytherin.

Harry immediately moved towards the other boy intend on making him eat his words but Hermione held him back.

"Harry, don't! It doesn't matter! Really! Let's just go!" she said as she ushered him away.

"But he's..."

"Harry! Don't!"

* * *

Ten minutes later Harry and Hermione had separated. Everywhere they went, Malfoy and his goons seemed to be not far away. They figured that by splitting up he could only hurt the chances of one of them. That person was Harry. In fact he was rather relieved that Draco and the dodos had decided to follow him because rather him than Hermione. He was currently near the forbidden forest on the outskirts of the area they were permitted to search.

"Hey, mate," Ron smiled at him. "Find anything?"

"Six more eggs," Harry replied and held up the tiny frilly basket to show Ron.

"Right! Listen up! Keep an eye on Malfoy right? This is going to be good!"

"What did you do?" smirked Harry.

"Just watch!"

Ron seemed not to be far away during the next ten minutes or so. He seemed to the trailing Malfoy, who in turn was following Harry. The three people were dancing around each other and since nothing was happening Harry began losing interest in Malfoy. His basket was half full now and if he weren't attacked again he'd likely be able to bring back a good addition to the Gryffindor pile.

" _Weasley!_ " The voice cut through the fresh spring air like a blade and Harry visibly winced at the sound of his least favorite professor. "Don't think I didn't see you, you dishonorable fool! Come over here this instant!"

Harry didn't look back. He didn't know what Ron was supposed to have done but he didn't want to attract Snape's attention – knowing full well that he'd get kicked out of the competition whether he was in on it or not! So he slowly edged away.

"Not fair! I was only..." protested Ron somewhere in the background.

"Don't you dare lie to me! I _saw_ you!" hissed the professor.

Their voices faded into non coherent noises as Harry got to safety. He couldn't see Hermione anywhere. She had to be on the other side of the castle. Determined to find her and tell her Ron had been caught doing whatever it was he'd been doing he walked around as quickly as he could. People were moving constantly and Harry saw nothing of the girl. She had to have moved back around again. So Harry kept walking in circles and found no eggs during this time. When he finally reached the spot where Ron had been caught he was winded and rather tired of the whole thing. No other students appeared to be searching here anymore. He even seemed to have lost Malfoy. The blond boy probably didn't fancy running around aimlessly after Harry when there was a competition to win. Speaking of which. Harry began searching the ground. Someone might have missed something besides he needed a moment before he walked back. After a while he'd found absolutely nothing.

He was just about to give up hope when he spotted something strange. A small area covered in what appeared to be... some kind of shimmery powder? Harry wasn't daft. He wasn't going to touch it. But it seemed really strange. As he looked at it he saw something shimmering next to it. An egg. Harry carefully picked it up without touching the powder and looked at it. Strange. This egg didn't look like any of the other ones he'd found. It was dark purple and and it shone. The other eggs sure hadn't looked like they were in fact chocolate but this one looked almost like it was metal. Curious Harry raised the egg to his lips and bit into it. It was chocolate alright. Creamy, dark chocolate. Oh, well. He'd already broken it. He popped the rest of the egg into his mouth and continued his search in the long grass. Weird. Harry felt... not tired but dizzy. Perhaps he didn't drink enough at lunch? The sun was not really warm enough to cause a heatstroke so what was going on?

Suddenly he lost his balance and fell to his knees. His head felt light but his stomach was rebelling against him. As soon as the ground spun slowly enough that he could trust himself not to throw up he fell backwards in the tall grass, giggling. It was a nice day. A very nice day indeed. He felt like he was lying in a nest. From here he couldn't see anything but grass and sky and it was wonderful.

Harry sighed with contentment and picked a buttercup. He rolled onto his stomach and raised himself with his elbows. He looked up at the clouds above him. That one right there looked like Dudley. It was every bit as round and plump as him. That one there looked like a broom. That one there looked like Snape. It had a large bit to it that was just like his nose. Harry laughed. That was funny. Ron would think that was funny. Where was Ron? Wasn't he supposed to be doing something? But it was so nice out and Harry felt like he could lie there forever. Harry giggled again. He'd just been thinking about something funny but he couldn't remember what it was.

Movement in the grass in front of him momentarily distracted him but he didn't look closely. He felt like he was flying. Yes, it was like the first time he flew on the Nimbus. He had the same fluttering feeling in his stomach and the cool breeze in his hair reminded him of shooting through the air. There is was again. Movement. This time Harry didn't ignore it. He got up onto his knees to get a better look of whatever it was. A smile formed on his lips. There, in the grass a few meters in front of him sat a small, fluffy, black rabbit.

"Oh, a bunny!" exclaimed Harry as his eyes widened with excitement.

At the sight of him the rabbit jumped and ran for the forbidden forest.

"Wait! Where are you going?" laughed Harry. He got on his feet and ran after the rabbit as fast a his legs could carry him. Why were rabbits so fast? Why was it scared of him anyway? He just wanted to pet it. He'd never seen a rabbit outside of pet stores anyway. He almost fell in the tall grass several times but he could still see the little black bunny jumping through the vegetation ahead of him. Soon tall trees surrounded him and the rabbit gained speed. It zigzagged through the trees almost as though it was trying to lose Harry instead of simply outrunning him.

Suddenly the rabbit disappeared in front of him as though it had been swallowed by the ground and Harry didn't have the time to stop himself before the ground disappeared beneath his feet and he too fell into the hole. He landed roughly at the bottom of the pit and winced in pain as his ankle twisted upon impact.

* * *

"Ow!" he cried as he got up in a sitting position, clutching his ankle. He took several deep breaths as a few tears ran down his cheeks. As soon as the pain was bearable he looked up. The pit was deep. Much too deep. There was no way he could climb that – let alone with an injured foot. He frantically looked around the pit hoping to see anything he could use to get out. He saw nothing of the sort but at the other end, staring at him, was the tiny black rabbit. It watched him calmly. Almost too calmly for an animal that had fled from him moments ago.

"At least you're still here with me," Harry smiled. It was odd. Just as his joy had been tremendous so had his fear but at the sight of the furry little friend he instantly calmed. It wasn't so bad when Mr Bunny was there with him.

"Do you think we can get out of here?" Harry asked the rabbit. "Maybe you can. Maybe I could throw you," he suggested. The rabbit suddenly backed up.

"No? Yeah, you're probably right. It's okay though! Ron is going to find us! He went... He went somewhere. I can't remember right now but he's really nice. You'd like him!" said Harry and winced as he accidentally moved his foot. The rabbit continued to stare at him.

"You're really cute!" Harry cooed as he carefully reached for the bunny.

"If you ever call me that again, Mr Potter, you will not live to see graduation!" sneered the rabbit in an all too familiar voice.

"You can talk?" Harry gasped.

"Of course I can, you idiot!"

Harry narrowed his eyes at the rabbit. "That's mean! You're a bad bunny!"

"You are testing my patience, Potter! Where's your wand?"

"My what?" inquired Harry as he pulled himself closer to the rabbit.

"Your wand! I've always known you to be dense but it seems you will never fail to surprise me with your stupidity! Your wand. Where is it?"

"You shouldn't talk to me like that. Bunnies are supposed to be nice," Harry stated.

"Potter, I'm not... For Merlin's sake, boy! If I didn't know any better I would say you were drunk!"

Harry giggled and reached out for the rabbit. "Can I pet you?"

"Absolutely not! Potter, snap out of it! What is wrong with you, child?"

"Dunno," Harry shrugged. "I feel great! Are you here for the egg hunt?"

The rabbit's ears perked. "Potter? Potter! Listen to me! Did you find any uncommon eggs?"

"I found lots. But I forgot them somewhere. And Malfoy broke Hermione's eggs, can you believe that?"

"Potter! Did you or did you not find any strange eggs? Any that didn't look like the others?"

"Pretty purple one!" Harry smiled. "It looked like metal but it was really chocolate."

"You _ate_ it?" the rabbit sneered in disbelief. "Of all the moronic, unbelievable..."

Harry didn't really listen to the bunny. He felt a bit sleepy now and so he lay down and closed his eyes. He'd just take a quick nap. Then he suddenly felt a weight on top of him. He groaned and shook to get it off.

"Potter! This is not the time for sleeping! Where's your wand, boy?" The rabbit cried as it jumped around on top of him, attempting to prevent his slumber. Harry in his content state just reached up and hugged the rabbit closer to his chest which caused the little creature to kick and wiggle violently.

"Let go of me this instant, you insolent brat!"

Harry did let go but he could barely keep his eyes open. "Okay, okay... Why are you so mean? I thought Easter Bunnies were meant to be nice!"

"I'm not an... Potter, have you lost your mind? When I find that Weasley boy I'm going to pickle his brains! Leaving such things out where people can step on them!" the rabbit huffed.

"Oi! Ron is my best mate!" Harry objected.

"Your wand," the bunny sighed.

"Huh?" said Harry as he pulled the wand out of his robes. "This?"

"Yes, _that._ Now Potter, focus, this is important. I want you to point it at me and say very clearly: _Finite Incantatem._ "

"Finish what?"

"Perhaps you had better practice first. _Finite Incantatem._ "

"Ugh, I don't want to do spells now. I want to sleep."

"Then we shall be stuck in this place until the spell wears off. Whatever you've ingested may leave your system before then but since we do not know the dosage it could be hours. And even so, you will not be able to get out of here alone and you'd still have to wait for me to turn back. I don't intend to wait that long. _Finite Incantatem._ "

"Mean bunny," Harry mumbled as he sat up a bit more.

"If you don't start practicing, you'll find out just how 'mean' I can be!"

"Finite Incantatem," Harry mumbled.

"Speak clearly!" the rabbit scolded.

" _Finite Incantatem,_ " Harry hissed at the bunny.

"Better! Now try it with your wand. Point it at me."

"No! I want to sleep," said Harry and lay back down. The rabbit immediately jumped on top of him and jumped up and down on his chest.

"Don't you _dare_ , Potter!"

But Harry simply turned angrily, sending the rabbit flying to the other end of the pit before he sat up and pointed the wand at it.

" _Finite Incantatem!_ " Then he demonstratively rolled onto his side, facing the side of the pit and thus didn't notice when the tiny fluffy creature expanded and became a very tall, dark and exceedingly displeased man. Snape knelt next to the tiny boy.

"Potter! Wake up! Look at me! Can you move your foot?"

"Snape?" said Harry, staring his teacher. "Where did the bunny go?"

Snape didn't answer that he simply grabbed Harry's ankle and rotated it slowly.

"Ow!" cried the boy. "That hurts!"

Snape felt the joint. "It's not broken but it is definitely sprained.

"Were you the bunny?" Harry said, arching a brow. "You were so fluffy!"

"I swear, Potter, if you ever speak a word about this to anyone you will be the sorriest boy in Britain!"

"I don't like bunnies. They are mean," mumbled Harry as he finally fell asleep. Snape shook his head in disbelief. This was the savior of the wizarding world. He pocketed the boy's wand where he kept his own before picking up the boy and lifting him out of the pit. Getting up was not a problem for Snape now that he possessed his normal height and soon he wandered out of the forest with the sleeping boy in his arms. If only Potter knew what he'd been saying. Severus smirked. Well, it would be a rude awakening – if the boy remembered anything. He hoped not. The boy looked so innocent when he was sleeping and it made Severus sick to his stomach. The boy suddenly stirred in his arms.

"Go back to sleep, Potter," Snape said as he neared the end of the forest. He preferred the boy silent.

"Mr Bunny?" the boy mumbled without opening his eyes. "I like bunnies. They're cute," he continued before returning to his slumber.

Severus smiled briefly in the solitude of the forest. Lily liked rabbits too.

* * *

Harry woke up to the sound of muffled voiced that slowly became clearer.

"Shh! Ron, you'll wake him!" he heard Hermione say.

"Sorry!"

"Huh?" said Harry as he opened his eyes and looked around. He was in the infirmary and his two friends were standing on either side of his bed.

"Oh, Harry! You're awake!" smiled Hermione.

"I'm so sorry, mate! I swear, I didn't know!"

"Huh? What are you talking about? What happened?" said Harry. His head felt like it was splitting.

"You don't remember?" inquired Hermione.

"You ate one of the joke eggs! I got them from Fred and George. I was going to put them so Malfoy would find them but Snape caught me! I had already put some out but I really didn't think you'd be the one to find them! I didn't know what they did... I'm sorry!"

"I don't remember anything. What happened to me?" Harry asked.

"You wandered into the forbidden forest, Harry," said Hermione. "You fell into a hole and twisted your ankle. You were drugged on one of Ron's _brilliant_ eggs. Snape found you and brought you out." Hermione glared at Ron who winced.

"He yelled my head off, he did. I'm pretty sure he'd have killed me if McGonagall hadn't stopped him. I still got detentions for a whole week!"

"Oh, is the contest over?"

"Harry, that was yesterday. Neville won third place and got a really nice book but the Hufflepuffs won all the other prizes. I didn't think it was even possible to find that many eggs."

"You really don't remember anything?" said Ron.

"No... Only I had a really weird dream," replied Harry as he sat up.

"About what?" said Hermione.

"I don't know... But Snape was a bunny," mumbled Harry.

"Mate, that is messed up!" said Ron, shaking his head.

 **The End**


End file.
